What’s On: Paintball Thursday!

Good day fellow Telephiles. It’s a monumentous thursday, deaths, weddings, and a buttload of paintball. Here are our recommendations for tonight, Thursday May 5 2011.

The Tops:

Community “A Fistful of Paintballs” 8:00 on NBC

Community’s best episode ever was last season’s Modern Warfare, it was probably the best comedy episode of 2010. Tonight Greendale revisits paintball and damn it looks great. Community’s mostly stellar second season had a few great event episodes (Christmas, Dungeons and Dragons) but nothing matching the pure greatness of Warfare. Obviously I have extrememly high expectations, and with Josh Holloway guest starring I refused to be let down. The hardest part will probably be waiting from now till next week to see the season finale’s conclusion.

The Vampire Diaries “The Sun Also Rises” 8:00 on CW

Jenna is in transition?!? Klaus has Elena? Damon got bit by Tyler? The last episode while not the strongest set in motion the final pieces of the season long Klaus Arc and I have no idea what’s going to happen or who’s gonna bite the dust (but someone IS dying tonight), but I’m excited to see it all go down. The Vampire Diaries biggest crime is that not much happens in the set up episodes, but the payoffs are always violent and fun. Next week’s finale is more romance centered, but will probably also be used to set in motion the events of next season. The Katherine twist/cliffhanger from last season still gives me chills.

Grey’s Anatomy “White Wedding” 9:00 on ABC

The first wedding on ABC tonight has Calzone tying the knot! Aww… Check out the clips to see the kind of emotionally manipulative hour we have on tap for this evening.

Parks and Recreation “Eagleton” 9:30 on NBC

Leslie goes head to head with her former best friend and Eagleton Parks employee Lindsay (guest star Parker Posey), when she puts up a fence in a park separating the two neighbouring towns. Word is a class war ensues. No promo (stupid NBC) just a pic.

Fifth Season Finale Alert!

30 Rock “Respawn” 10:00 on NBC

I’m still having trouble with the fact that Jack’s wife Avery has been kidnapped and assimilated into North Korea. Tonight Jack uses Kenneth to replace Avery, also Liz tries to enjoy her hiatus but her Hamptons stay is ruined by Tracy, and Jenna and Paul (guest star Will Forte) have a disagreement regarding her career. No promo either, just trust that it’ll be good. Vacation Liz looks great, huh?

The Rest:

American Idol 8:00 on FOX – Why do the judges hate on Haley? Lauren is WAY more offensive.

The Big Bang Theory 8:00 on CBS – Penny uses Bernedette to try to break up Priya (guest star Aarti Mann) and Leonard.

Wipeout 8:00 on ABC – Bored now.

Rules of Engagement 8:30 on CBS – Please CBS, free Warburton from this mess.

CSI 9:00 on CBS – Someone’s dying in the next few weeks. I say it’s Conrad Ecklie.

Bones 9:00 on FOX – Things get serious for a few weeks before a lighter finale.

The Office 9:00 on NBC – D’Angelo officially takes over and shit doth hit the fan.

Nikita 9:00 on CW – Amanda (Melinda Clarke) has Alex in her clutches and know what she’s up to. And shockingly I still can’t be bothered to care anymore.

The Mentalist 10:00 on CBS – I’m really interested to see who the mole in the CBI is. My money is on Grace’s pretty-boy fiance (Eric Winter).

Private Practice 10:01 on ABC – After a tough year, Charlotte and Cooper tie the knot tonight.

Outsourced 10:30 on NBC – Just die already, so charming lead Ben Rappaport can find a project suited to his talents.

Secret Diary of a Call Girl 10:30 on SHO – Rose Tyler in sexy and compromising situations. That the only reason any of you pervs watch right?


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