Survivor Recap “I don’t really look into the future that much.”

J: So P, did you find this week’s survivor lived up to your incredibly high standards?

P: actually — yes. I even managed not to fast forward either of the challenges. I thought the reward one was incredibly suspenseful and challenging this week and I played along with the immunity challenge. What does Brenda do for a living again?

J: Miami dolphins cheerleader slash bartender

Yes I agree this week was another good installment in a mediocre season

The challenges are getting more intense, like the MTV series the Challenge…those games are messed up

P: I don’t think its the survivor team’s fault though

J: Why on earth did chase choose the women?

P: this was a poorly cast season with a few fantasticos

Chase is a MORON

I thought at first it was a good strategy

because they had some numbers and he could coast with them for a while and eventually win immunity challenges on his own

but as Brenda said — he has no balls

or in other words perhaps

J: Brenda knew right away he was killing his social game with that decision. He was like Kurt choosing the Girls team in the sing-off.

Brenda is so smart I just wish she was more aggressive

Like Parvati

she’s Parvati lite

P: ::but Kurt can do no wrong::

Brenda is playing a very strong game, but I’m still hoping for a Brenda/Sash blindside. They are too cocky

and I’m sick of hearing how they are in charge. I’m a Fabio fan all the way

J: Fabio this episode showed SOME gameplay this week. Some strategy

He was thinking

I was shocked

P: ha agreed. maybe he’s not so vapid afterall…

let’s talk about what did Marty in

I will miss his hair, but not his scheming

J: His plans never really made any sense to me. He played really transparently.

I can’t imagine any situation where I would give another person my idol in exchange for my life

NO SENSE!!! it worked but I still am so confused

P: well I think once the merge happened Marty was lost and had to scramble, with the older folks he was QUEEN BEE

but as soon as he was on the outs his strategies made no sense. (i was still sore about Jimmy Johnson too)

J: Jimmy Johnson was the smartest move he made. He was the first from his tribe to make an actual cutthroat move. He needed that to assert his leadership.

P: but I looooooooooooooved him. he was adorable.

fine. I’m thinking with my heart. that’s why i can’t make it on survivor. I’d be the female Erik Reichenbach (hopefully less stupid)

J: Hopefully

Marty was eventually done in by his mouth and Jane’s likeability

It was like he was calling a Carebear a Nazi

P: hahahaha he was right though, but poorly timed. Jane will win it if she makes it to the end. But I honestly don’t think they needed her out right now

let’s talk about the 2 bigger shockers.

1) DAN IS STILL IN THE GAME

2) NAONKA IS A REAL HUMAN BEING

J: 1) I get the Dan thing…

he’s a genuine nice guy,

P: I hate players like Dan. he had no business getting on the show

J: he ruffles no feathers

WELL THATS TRUE

P: nice guys don’t wear 1200 (?) dollar shoes in the jungle

J: how did casting allow that

P: no clue. (though I’m still in shock over jimmy t…seriously what was going on in casting this season)

J: I’m surprised they didn’t cast a Jersey Shore type

in the younger tribe

SO Has Kelly purple had one confessional yet?

P: ….WHO?

J: EXACTLY!

WHO IS KELLY PURPLE!

P: EXACTLY!

this is whathisface from Samoa.. Brett

BRETT!

WHATHISFACE

J: Wow. Her lack of screentime is shocking…like what could it be… is she that boring of a human being?

Brett at least talked in tribal sometimes.

P: it’s that Naonka is crazy

J: WORD

P: period.

let’s break them down one by one

who is in the best position right now?

J: Brenda hands down. She has no enemies. Anyone gunning for her would take out Naonka or sash first

P: Naonka will likely make it far just for being a terrible person. It’s like Fabio is the only one who sees it. I don’t understand

how can anyone stand to be in her presence

J: I don’t get it. Is it racist to think it’s stupid that their alliance is based on race?

P: their alliance is based on race

J: I think everyone sees what Naonka is, they just realize she is  GOLD to bring to the final three

P: they said so!

J: I know is it racist to say that that is STUPID!

P: I’d probably kill my vote and vote for her to win it. just so I don’t give it to the idiot who brought her along

J: HAH!

P: I’d say Dan has less of a shot than Naonka. he has zero chance of winning a single immunity. Even with the mental games he has checked out

J: I think Dan’s gone nest week. Provided no one does anything annoying, he’s the easiest target.

Biggest threat to Brenda?

P: why bother — if they have the chance to get rid of a physical threat they should do it! benry and fabio would be the smartest take downs b/c of immunity win possibilities

J: but they are liked, and sometimes it’s easier on the tribe to make the easy decision for a week

P: this is an individual game now

J: but everyone is playing so passively

the PASSIVE option is Dan

P: if they are all about their racial melting pot alliance, they should play that way

I guess

I just hate to admit another boring week is in store

OOO OOO

WAIT

WHAT ABOUT THE PROMO

LETS TALK PROMO!!!!

J: Don’t think my DVR caught it…

P: I cant find it!!!

basically something terrible happens at the camp and they are all crying and freaking out

J: wait I’m looking on CBS

OMFG

P: RIGHT!!! WHAT HAPPENS

J: I think Dan’s knee explodes

P: this is why we need to recap this show right away

I’m sure his knee does not explode

maybe a fire?

maybe a dead animal!?!?

J: Machete Accident?!?!

P: hmmmmmmmm

the possibilities are endless

J: So final questions: Who is Brenda’s biggest threat?

P: Sash – he can turn the guys against her

they have no clue what he’s up to

J: What’s up with Benry?

P: he’s a pig

but a good physical player for now.

not much has been done so far for strategy (that weve seen) but his convo with Fabio gave some good insight

J: Final three are Naonka Fabio and Holly WHO WINS?

P: Fabio

I hope

but could be Naonka

Brenda and sash seem to actually like her

J: It makes no actual sense to me…Maybe she’s just getting the nastiest edit cause there’s no other actual characters…

P: u cant edit the words she’s said about Kelly B

she is TERRIBLE

I’d say Fabio wins it

He’s bothered no one.

Holly is a wildcard

Dan could vote for her on the condition she buys him new shoes

J: I STILL cant believe she did that… OH! Fabio did piss off someone.. NAONKA but … yeah….she’s kinda just the worst

P: Fabio didn’t’ piss off Naonka. he spoke, and she decided she doesn’t like his voice. therefore she decided he was an issue

J: I didn’t say it was for a good reason, i just said he pissed her off..

She’s a TEACHER

TEACHER

I laugh as I type

TEACHER

P: not for long I’m sure

J: well dems da breaks

P: at least she has practice stealing food for survival

J: BAZINGA!

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